How to elope without feeling guilty

You might have noticed we’ve got a bit of a thing for elopements here at Lower Barns! Not only is eloping incredibly romantic, you’ll save money and the stress of having to plan a big do. As elopements tend to stir up a lot of emotions in people, here is a little guide on how to elope without causing rifts and feeling guilty.

Explain your reasons

When you tell your nearest and dearest of your plans to elope, they could react in many different ways. Some will be genuinely happy for you, others may feel upset or offended that you aren’t involving them and a minority might actually be angry about your plans. All you can do is calmly explain to them why you are choosing to elope.

Allow people to have feelings

Put yourself in their shoes: your mum no longer gets to help you plan the day, your dad won’t walk you down the aisle and your best friend won’t get to be maid of honour. While they’re not entitled to those things, it makes sense that they might be a bit sad about not getting to do them. The kindest thing to do is let them know you understand where they’re coming from, but you’ve decided that eloping is what the two of you, as a couple, really want.

Splurge on a good photographer

People will still be keen to see your wedding, so it’s worth hiring a photographer to snap some beautiful pictures of your day. You could even plump for a videographer, so they can see the whole thing. Check out our gallery and videos for some inspiration!

Throw a separate party

After you’ve eloped, get your closest bunch of friends and family together for an intimate party so you can celebrate your marriage. It could be a pot luck dinner at home, fancy cocktails at a bar or even a leisurely brunch. The point is to make some time for everyone to get together and celebrate.

Make an announcement

You should ideally tell your parents and close friends that you’re planning to elope before you say ‘I do’. Nobody wants to find out their daughter is now a Mrs via Facebook! You don’t need to tell everyone in advance, but once you’re married it’s nice to give people a heads-up. You could go old school and put an announcement in the paper or you could send a Christmas card ‘from Mr & Mrs’ with a cheeky ‘P.S. We eloped’. Nobody could stay mad at that sweet gesture!

Love Janie x

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